Archief - [wreedOT] 4chan Party Van!

The Girlfriend Theory (Part 1)
2009/01/29 by: Pete

COLOR KEY:
Blue = OP (Original Poster)
Purple = Responses being chosen by 2ch users

1 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:24:50.30 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
If I go through all the girls in my contacts list
and to each one of them, send an email asking them to go out with me
at least one of them is bound to say yes, right? lololol

I will do this right now
just to prove this excellent theory to you guys


2 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:26:05.12 ID:MuX1GX/JO
Bulk email it!

3 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:27:14.54 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Okay okay lolol
Right now I have like 14 girls on my contacts list
I’ll start off with the girls I could care less about hahah


4 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:27:20.90 ID:05FbheMiO
I’ll root for you!
Boobs! Boobs!
_ 　∩
( ﾟ∀&#65439彡
(　⊂彡
|　　|
し⌒Ｊ

6 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:31:07.60 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
I’ll start off with these 5 girls lolololol. By the way, if any of them OK me, I’ll reject them.
I don’t even give a fuck if they respond.

1: High school classmate 1 - Cute - we had a businesslike relationship at school
2: High school classmate 2 - Fugly - friends during high school
3: High school classmate 3 - Muscular - friends during high school
4: School club senpai 1 - Bitch - gave me the nickname “silhouette” and always made fun of me
5: Sister - Age: 25 - obsessed with fashion. we haven’t spoken to each other for the past six months

Oh, and 12th post ITT gets to decide the email subject line


7 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:34:57.60 IDVb8gC0r0
That’s quite a lineup you have there

12 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:42:45.20 ID:lf+O1N6T0 Purple
It’s been a while. I have something really important to tell you.

15 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:47:44.87 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>12
Ok, sent those messages with that subject line.

Next up lolol

6: Middle school classmate - Really cute - my reason for living. she hated me.
7: High school classmate 4 - Otaku - I was her only friend. fujoshi.
8: School club kouhai 1 - Plain - kind of emo. we were both made fun of by School club senpai 1
9: School club douki 1 - Ordinary - somewhat cute, has a boyfriend
10: My mom - Age: 49 - is nice to me, even though I’m half-hikikomori. Buddhist.

I’m a bit more serious about these ones, so I’ll come up with the message myself this time.
I’ll go with “I know this is sudden, but what do you think of me?” lololol


18 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:50:51.39 ID:f8KZKAZq0
LOLOL you’re targeting your mother too?

19 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:50:57.36 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Some replies already ololol
“We cannot find the specified user,” it says
For #2,3, and my sister hahaha


21 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:53:30.22 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Alright, here are the last ones, my top choices:

11: School club douki 2 - Cute - even though she’s cute, she’s nice to me
12: School club senpai 2 - Nice - was always there for me, giving advice
13: Childhood friend - Bitch - we live near each other and go to the same college. she used to be nice, but became a bitch after graduating from middle school
14: Sister #2 - Age: 22 - gymnastics instructor. good with her legs

This is it! I would be happy with any of these girls lolol

To all of them, I’ll send the message “I love you”. Here goes nothing! lolol


27 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:57:57.08 ID:1BDT8eYT0
Is this guy drunk?

28 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 18:58:09.22 ID:rQ/mC1l80
OP, I love you

32 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 19:01:33.81 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Got a reply from High school classmate 1:
“Who are you…?”

Pfft, it’s not like I care about her response lolol
I guess I don’t have to reply to this one


33 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 19:03:17.23 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
A reply from my childhood friend came!!!
“Ooh, thank you ☆ By the way, do you have the notes for the previous Economics lecture?”

SHE…..TOTALLY….AVOIDED THE SUBJECT….LOLOLOLOL


35 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 19:05:29.22 ID:9h7t0zXM0
>>33
(^=ω=^) ・・・

35 ：以下、名無しにかわりましてVIPがお送りします。：2008/01/28(&#26376 19:05:29.22 ID:9h7t0zXM0 Blue
More replies!
From #12, School club senpai 2:
“lol wat? are you feeling okay?”

noooo…why..? another rejection?

Also, from #11, School club douki 2:
&#8220;Sorry! ><&#8221;

Hahah, wtf kind of response is that?


36 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:06:28.38 ID14SD0Sr0
Even if OP is making this up, it&#8217;s still pretty damn funny

37 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:07:45.68 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Reply from Sister #2:
&#8220;Can I kick you?&#8221;

oh shit lolol
she once managed to break the door to my room with one of her kicks


38 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:10:34.87 ID:w6WQCUfMO
Sister #2 sounds scaaary&#8212;-

40 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:11:28.73 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Alright, so of the people who have responded, I&#8217;ll put them in order of who I&#8217;d prefer:
1: Sister #2
2: Childhood friend
3: Senpai #2
4&#12288;Douki #2
5&#12288;Classmate #1

Is this really going to be it?

ITT, 45th post gets to choose my response to these people


45 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:14:22.23 ID14SD0Sr0 Purple
If you&#8217;re busy now, this is important so please read it later.

I love you. Please go out with me.
I am seriously serious about these feelings I have for you.
Therefore, this cannot be a lie or a joke.
Please think about it. I look forward to your reply.


48 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:16:52.63 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>45
Alllllrright!! Sending it now.


54 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:18:49.82 ID:hw5a82Pb0
I wonder if he actually stands a chance..

56 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:20:08.55 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Reply from Sister #2!
That was really fast:
&#8220;Stay where you are. I&#8217;m coming over to punch your face in&#8221;

Oh fuck LOLOL she went from threatening to kick me to punching me?


57 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:21:04.73 ID14SD0Sr0
>>56
I don&#8217;t care whether she&#8217;s going to kick you or punch you, but hurry up and post the other replies!

59 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:23:05.46 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>57
I haven&#8217;t gotten any other responses yet.
Plus, I&#8217;ll need time to think of responses for each of them anyways..

65th post ITT >> Sister #2 repsonse


64 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:24:51.57 ID:QzgCY8R90
Is he seriously in love with his own sister?!

65 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:24:58.23 ID:1BDT8eYT0 Purple
I sent that message out to quite a few people, but you&#8217;re the only one that&#8217;s responded..

Do people hate me?


68 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:26:40.39 ID:c4PUs8om0
You&#8217;re sister is definitely tsundere


72 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:29:02.77 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Hahaha
my sister just came and kicked me lolol
Anyways, I sent >>65 but I think Sister #2 is out of the game

From my Childhood friend:
&#8220;It&#8217;s kind of late to be saying that now. Are you retarded? What about those Economics notes?&#8221;

Haha, she keeps asking about Economics..

77th post ITT>>Childhood friend reply


77 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:31:09.28 ID14SD0Sr0 Purple
You see, it turns out that I really like *bleep*
I mean, I think this would be obvious to you though
But I&#8217;m having a hard time suppressing certain&#8230;feelings&#8230;for you


81 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:33:59.76 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>77 sent!
At this rate I&#8217;ll be getting a girlfriend before the 100th post lololol


84 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:35:44.72 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
From School club senpai 2:
&#8220;Sorry, I can&#8217;t. If you&#8217;re not doing well, do you want to talk over the weekend?&#8221;

Haha, it&#8217;s like she&#8217;s already half-going out with me..
Anyways, lets hold off on her for now


85 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:36:04.01 IDfwbYA430
I&#8217;m still waiting for the responses of the first group. Such high tension!

90 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:41:28.07 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
From my Childhood friend:
&#8220;I&#8217;m actually in love with your notes lol. Seriously though, do you have them or not?&#8221;

olol she&#8217;s not being fooled anymore
Reply>>ITT 95th post


95 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:44:51.14 IDfwbYA430 Purple
STFU BITCH!
I&#8217;ll give you my notes so go out with me.


99 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:46:47.92 ID:w6WQCUfMO
>>95
Oh shi&#8211; what&#8217;s going to happen now? lol

102 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:49:39.70 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
My mom just called for me:
&#8220;Did you send this email to the wrong person? When you do this kind of thing, you have to say it in person.&#8221;

Ah, mom, it&#8217;s already too late for that lolol

>>95 sent reply


102 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:49:39.70 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Childhood friend reply came!
&#8220;Die, you bastard lol. I&#8217;m going to have to beat you up lol.&#8221;

uhoh *gulp*
This girl has been bullying me for a while now hehe

Reply>>ITT 112th post


112 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 19:58:24.10 ID14SD0Sr0 Purple
I&#8217;m sorry, I&#8217;m not in the mood for joking anymore.
I&#8217;m sorry that I said I loved you.
My feelings for you are so strong that I can&#8217;t bear it any longer.
I&#8217;ll disappear now&#8230;goodbye.


119 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:01:13.92 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>112
Sent it.
Isn&#8217;t she going to cry? lol I feel bad for her


120 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:01:21.82 ID:TGaDSnxrO
This is starting to get pretty interesting..

118 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:00:08.40 ID:hx+DZpb50
btw, let&#8217;s hear your specs

124 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:08:43.48 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
Alright, my specs:
20 years old, college sophomore, nice guy
and I am carefully protecting my virginity lololol

Childhood friend reply:
&#8220;Wait! Calm down, lets talk it over. lol and what about the notes?&#8221;

She&#8217;s not getting angry at all lol. I guess we&#8217;ll give it one more try.
Reply>>ITT 130th post


130 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:10:38.67 ID:c4PUs8om0 Purple
Between my notes and me, which one is more IM&#9734;POR&#9734;TANT to you?


133 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:10:44.42 ID:WXC/D06T0
Haha, they&#8217;re all rejecting you.
Sleuth kill lol

141 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:13:19.91 ID:9ju+h4r2O Blue
>>130 ok, I sent it, but I got this from School club douki 2:
&#8220;It&#8217;s kind of late to be saying that now lolol. Are you retarded? Do you have those Economics notes? lololol&#8221;

WHAAAATTT? How did she know about&#8230;


142 &#65306;&#20197;&#19979;&#12289;&#21517;&#28961;&#12375;&#12395;&#12363;&#12431;&#12426;&#12414;&#12375;&#12390;VIP&#12364;&#12362;&#36865;&#12426;&#12375;&#12414;&#12377;&#12290;&#65306;2008/01/28(&#26376 20:14:46.08 IDfwbYA430
>>141
OH SHIT LOLOL she found out about this thread

*****End : Part 1*****

TL Note: Haha, this thread is a lot longer than I thought it would be. Some awesome shit goes down in the next parts of the thread, not to give anything away *cough*sex*cough*. Anyways, this will probably be split into a total of 3 parts.